I will never forget the day our inspired Bishop knocked on our door one Sunday after church. He explained that during church that day, he felt a strong impression that he needed to visit our home and give each family member a blessing. We were a little surprised and unsure of what this meant, but we welcomed him in. He gave each of our children and my husband beautiful blessings that promised them strength and guidance in their lives. I was the last one to receive a blessing. I clearly remember the words, “You and your family will have trials and tribulations that will be beyond your imagination.” I also remembered the words that followed were filled with promises of strength, help and protection to endure the trials. After the Bishop left, I found myself grateful for his inspiration but also very confused as to what this could mean. After all, things were going well for our family. We had three beautiful children and were expecting our fourth, a little girl we would name Sarah.
After 10 years and several miscarriages, we were thrilled to be expecting again; however, a few weeks after receiving the blessings from our Bishop, I noticed that our baby was not moving. It was April 7th, 2007, the day before Easter. I needed peace of mind and decided to go in for a check-up. The doctor could not detect a heartbeat. Eight hours later, our daughter was stillborn. We were given time to hold our sweet baby girl and to say goodbye. The loss of our baby girl was heart breaking.
The following months were dark and lonely and I felt crushed. My pain was so intense, my heart broken and shattered. One evening I cried inconsolably to my husband and He comforted me by saying that sometimes our Heavenly Father has to stretch out our hearts, possibly even break them, in order for our hearts to have more room to give and receive.
And receive we did! Three months later I became pregnant with our fifth child. We found out we were having a boy and his due date was on April 7th, 2008, exactly one year after we lost Sarah. Logan was born healthy and strong and has been a complete joy to our family.
This trial had been unimaginable, but our story does not end there. Shortly after Logan turned one, I was diagnosed with Invasive Lobular Carcinoma in my left breast. A whirlwind of tests and appointments revealed that the cancer was in both breasts. I started chemotherapy right away. The treatments made me very ill, but I was given so much help to endure. Family and friends selflessly left their homes and traveled to take care of our family. Friends cleaned our home, cooked meals, took care of our children and drove me to appointments. Through each trial we were strengthened by our family, friends, and ward family.
Four months of chemo was followed by a bi-lateral mastectomy and weeks of unbearable pain. Numerous complications required emergency surgery which nearly took my life and was followed by still more complications. My body was completely worn out and I was having a very difficult time fighting to stay alive. Thankfully, an inspired priesthood holder was there again in the moment I needed strength.
One of my doctors was LDS and stopped by my hospital room to see how I was doing. He offered to give me a blessing with my husband. I felt a renewed sense of strength and comfort from this priesthood blessing, and within two weeks, I was back home. The following year was filled with more reconstructive surgeries and recoveries. As if the cancer was not enough, my husband has been laid off twice during the past two years and I managed to total our mini-van!
Yes, these trials were beyond our imagination, but not one time were we left alone. We were always blessed beyond our imagination! We were loved through these trials and the support of family and friends strengthened and sustained us. We will be forever grateful for the strength, faith and love that were given to us by a very loving Heavenly Father. He has always known exactly what we have needed and has shown us His love through priesthood blessings and dear family and friends.