44. Cheering for Peace with Tammy Uzelac Hall
Do you have a friend who can brighten your whole day because of how encouraging they are? Or perhaps you are that friend! Uplifting others is a Christlike attribute that brings so much peace to our lives, and it is one of the easiest things to do! It’s a gift we can give others regardless of our means or circumstances. So how do we make encouragement a part of our every day lives and lean on the Savior Jesus Christ as our biggest example?
“Build a foundation of encouragement in all your relationships.” — Tammy Uzelac Hall
President Russell M. Nelson said that "the best is yet to come for those who spend their lives building up others." We all want that best to be in our lives right now! Kathryn is joined by Tammy Uzelac Hall, a fellow podcaster and friend, and they discuss how they can build others through encouragement.
If we are in the habit of encouraging others, we will build a positive foundation for every relationship in our lives so that when disagreements might come, we can always fall back on that trust.
Heavenly Father is always encouraging us in our pursuits to try new adventures or leaps of faith.
The Lord was the ultimate example of encouragement, and he did it by service to others.
Encouragement isn't always vocal. You can bear one another's burdens by sitting with them or listening or sharing your experience in a way that might lift others.
Small & Simple Challenge
Find one person in your ward that you don’t know and talk to them. Hear their story. That’s how foundations get started and you can create that foundation of encouragement.
Transcript +
President Russell M. Nelson 00:01 My dear brothers and sisters, the best is yet to come for those who spend their lives building up others.
Kathryn Davis 00:13 Hi, and welcome to Magnify an LDS Living podcast where we cheer, inspire, and embolden each other as women and followers of Christ. We help to use our influence to make a difference in the world. I'm your host, Kathryn Davis, a mom, a seminary teacher, and a grilling enthusiast who loves God. Do you have a friend who can brighten your whole day because of how encouraging they are? Or perhaps you are that friend, uplifting others is a Christ like attribute that brings so much peace into our lives. And it is one of the easiest things to do. It's a gift we can give others regardless of our means or circumstances. So how do we make encouragement, a part of our everyday lives and lean on the Savior Jesus Christ as our biggest example? I'm joined by someone who I think is very encouraging, and I'm so excited to be with her. Tammy Uzelac. Hall. Tammy, thank you so much for being here.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 01:06 Sure. It'll be great.
Kathryn Davis 01:08 This is gonna be such a fun conversation. And I couldn't think of anybody better to talk about encouragement than you.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 01:16 Well, thank you.
Kathryn Davis 01:17 No, I feel that I feel that.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 01:19 I read it. I was like, Oh, this will be rough.
Kathryn Davis 01:24 No, I honestly, I think even when I was on your podcast, you just have this way of building others and I love it.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 01:33 Well, thank you. I really appreciate that.
Kathryn Davis 01:36 So I'm excited to talk with you. But Tammy, before we dive in to the topic of encouragement, and President Nelson's talk peacemakers needed. I have a couple of rapid fire questions for you.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 01:51 Bring it on. Let's do this? Yes. I know this. I've been prepping myself. Like, what will she ask me? Okay, here we go.
Kathryn Davis 01:58 Maybe I should change it up. If you've been prepping. Maybe I have to ask something really hard?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 02:02 I've done my homework. Kathryn. I've done my homework. Yes. Hot dogs. Cotton candy? Yes. No, no, I'm just kidding. Go ahead and ask me anything. I'm gonna open book.
Kathryn Davis 02:12 Oh, that's good. Okay, you and I have a big thing in common, which is that we both do this podcast thing. And you are the host of Sunday on Monday, which I love to listen to. Oh, thanks. I don't know if you ever get this question. But I get asked all the time. Do you ever get tired of talking to people? I know how I would answer that question. But I want to know, do you ever get tired of talking to people?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 02:36 That is a great question. The answer is no. But I will say this there's like a caveat with that. My friends always... always they laugh at me because I don't really like people. I mean, I say that. I laugh because there's the Seinfeld bit we're in it in this Seinfeld says, I've never met anybody I loved as much as I love a plate of nachos. And I'm like, That's my love language. He just said how i feel like i. So I always joke and I really like people, but I do. I love people's stories. I when I meet someone or i My husband will tell you when I see somebody I always say, Boy, do I want to know that story. And I would love to just talk to them and find out where they're from. I think sometimes that would be a really fun podcast, is to carry a couch around with you all over the cities all over the United States and just plop it somewhere, find someone who will talk to you and just say let's do this.
Kathryn Davis 03:26 Oh, that'd be awesome. Okay, next question. You have this belief, I think this is so funny, that cheese is God's way of saying everything is going to be okay.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 03:37 100% Yep. Listen, everything can be solved with melted cheese. See, it goes back to nachos. I mean. Right. That's World Peace right there. You want encouragement? I'll just get out a nice play to cheese, and we're gonna sit down and eat some cheese.
Kathryn Davis 03:54 I love it. Okay, if you could only eat one type of cheese. What type of cheese are you choosing?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 04:01 Ah, to all my brothers and sisters in Wisconsin. Holla. Shout out because there is a place called the cheese box. And we went there. And they have chocolate cheese. I'm not even kidding. Like that. Yeah. It's like they made cheese out of chocolate milk. Chocolate cheese. It was so delicious. That I'm choosing chocolate cheese. Yeah.
Kathryn Davis 04:23 Wow. Yeah, I have to try that.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 04:26 So good. There it is.
Kathryn Davis 04:27 Well, Tammy, I'm anxious to get to talk with you about President Nelson's talk peacemakers needed. And before we dive in, can I just ask you what did you think of that talk when you first heard it?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 04:42 Listen, let's get real. All right. Here's the deal, Kathryn. I am like the worst person to be on this episode right now with this topic. No, I really Yeah, it's okay. When he gave this talk back in April of 2023. This is like a landmark talk, right? Yes. It's so good, and I'm hearing it. I'm feeling the spirit. I'm like, this is awesome. And of course when he said there's probably someone you know who needs this, there was, I'm not gonna lie. I thought of a few people. But what I didn't I I'm read listening to this talk going. That is so me. I'm a peacemaker. I love it. Well, 58 days later, unbeknownst to me, the Spirit's like, well get ready, buckle up, sister, because you're about to have to prove this in your own life. And 58 days later, exactly. I'm counting it because something happened in my life where I mean it was, and still is, not good. Like I was, I'm devastated. My feelings were hurt. Things were said. I'm not in a good place emotionally. And so now I'm reading this talk. And I'm like, Ah, why? Why do I have to this talk right now, I don't want to be a peacemaker. I don't. I want to be sad, I want to be hurt. I want to be angry, I want to go through all the feelings of the grief cycle. I just want to like I want to be in this space right now. I don't want to encourage at all. And when I read this talk, I have read it so many times. In preparation for this. My note, I have copious notes everywhere. I'm like, I'm not an angry person, though. That's the thing. Like one of my spiritual gifts is the ability to be a peacemaker. I'm the oldest of five, I take care of people. But this has really rocked my world. And so what did I love about his talk? Nothing right now, because it's kicking my butt. It's calling me to action. And it wasn't supposed to. It's supposed to call other people to action. Right.
Kathryn Davis 06:39 That's why you're on here. Because honestly, for the real because so many of us have been there, or we are there. And then we think what's wrong with me? Because this is how I feel. And everybody else seems to be like, Oh, they're so good at this.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 06:55 I'm just I'm not here to give you any answers or platitudes. I mean, I'm gonna give you the real where this talk was hard to read. There were things that I read that I'm like, oh, yeah, that resonated with me. Towards the end, there was a big aha, where I was like, okay, that's what it means to encourage, like, I'm excited about what the Spirit taught me at the end. I've been studying this for over a month. And it's taken me a month to finally get to a place where I'm like, Alright, I might be okay. I think the Lord and our Heavenly Father get it. And they allow us some time, like it's okay to take some time.
Kathryn Davis 07:27 Well, I am excited then to hear what you've learned. Let's start with one of my favorite sentences from this talk from President Nelson. I actually, when I first heard this talk, I loved this sentence. And so I typed it up, and I stuck it on my mirror, and I stuck it on my son's mirror, because that's what resonated with him too. This sentence right here where President Nelson said, "My dear brothers and sisters, the best is yet to come for those who spend their lives building up others." And that, for some reason, resonated with me, because I, I wanted to be a builder. But I also was intrigued by that phrase, the best is yet to come.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 08:11 What I love about what the prophet is trying to teach us here is if you're in the constant habit of building up others, always, if you're in the constant habit of encouraging people... I love, I looked up the word encouragement in the Webster's 1828 dictionary, it's my favorite one to use. It says encouragement means the act of giving courage, confidence and success. The act of giving someone courage, the act of giving someone confidence, and the act of giving someone success. If that's what your goal in life is, then you're building a foundation with everyone in your life that is positive, so that when times get heated, or when there's discord, everyone's more apt to be peaceful about it, as opposed to this knee jerk reaction where you hate the person and words are shared. And it's explosive. I think that's what he's saying. Like, if you can live a life where you encourage people, then when you get in a fight with them, it won't be explosive, because they'll know your heart, you'll know their heart. I would like to think of the times when I've been in fights with my dearest friends, where normally, if we didn't know each other really well, we probably hate each other and walk away. But because we've known each other, we've encouraged each other through or whatever it is, we know each other's hearts. And it's easier to just apologize and be a peacemaker. So I think for me, that was what it taught me is how important it is to just start with that in every relationship. So it's your foundation.
Kathryn Davis 09:29 So can you think of an example of a time when either you were encouraging or someone was encouraging for you and that led to more peace in your life?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 09:42 Well, I can tell you a time when I wasn't encouraging. So here we go. Because this is the one that came to my mind. And this one stood out to me because when I read that question, immediately I'm like, oh, boy, but no, I know when I wasn't and what what happened because of it. So my oldest, she wanted to run for office in seventh grade. She came home so excited. Like I got the piece of paper, and I'm going to run for student body office. And my, my reaction to her was, Oh, that's interesting. Do you think you'll win? I don't know if you should run. Oh, the Spirit immediately was like, you're an idiot. I mean, seriously, that moment was, what is your problem? You don't get to say that. You don't know if she's... and that is all the thoughts I had like you're right. What is my problem seriously? Why would I have said that? That is the dumbest thing in the world to say. So I apologize to her. And I'm like, You know what we're doing this, we are going full force. And we put up posters, and we ran a solid campaign and she lost. But the next year, when she came to me and said, I'm running for office, again, I'm like, You bet you are. And we're doing this. And what I learned is, from that point on, every time a child has come to me and said, I want to do this, I want to do this, I'm like, 100%, if you want it, I'll help you make that happen. Even though I know the odds are completely against this child, that there's just no way. It's not my job to not encourage that. And then I love I have friends right here when my other daughter ran for office, and she lost, she was devastated. And they found out and they came over and brought her ice cream and said celebrate your losses. This is the best. So they encouraged her in her losing. And I just like all this encouragement, and all this wonderful, and it just made my daughter feel at peace. And so that that's my example of when I wasn't encouraging. And I learned a very good lesson.
Kathryn Davis 11:27 But Tammy, I think your intentions were to try and protect her.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 11:31 Oh, for sure. I didn't want her to be devastated at our loss. Yeah.
Kathryn Davis 11:35 Right. And that's interesting to think of in trying to protect, are we not encouraging and look what she learned through her loss.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 11:44 Right, and more good came out, I feel like more good comes out of trying and losing than not trying at all.
Kathryn Davis 11:50 I think celebrating the failure is so important. That's something we've always tried to do.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 11:54 Well, I can't imagine Heavenly Father saying to any of us, you probably shouldn't do that. You're not going to make it. You know, I feel like he encourages us in everything, at least in my life, when I've gone to and said, I'm going to try this, do it fantastic. He's also encouraging.
Kathryn Davis 12:09 And I think I learned that so distinctly when my oldest son was really into sports, at a very young age, was very competitive. And I remember being at one of his games, and there were some intense parents on the sideline and giving really good advice and really good instruction and really helping their children. And we didn't know very much, especially my husband. And so I remember getting back in the car, that first game, and I was thinking, oh, let's help him. I can tell him to do this or to do this just to help him right. And my husband was like, that was so great. It was so good. You did this. And that's all he ever said. So not one time did he ever get, "oh do this better, or do that." And I can see as a parent, and especially for my son, how he excelled with that. It wasn't my job to correct. I can leave that to the coaches and it took off all the pressure. I just got to go and enjoy and to be his biggest cheerleader. Awesome. And I think you're right. That's how Heavenly Father is with us. Right. He's our biggest cheerleader.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 13:21 And I think that's really cool, because then he creates that foundation with us by encouraging us so that when things don't go our way, we turn to him and just go, "Oh, that was rough." Or "my feelings are really hurt. I'm super sad right now." And God's like, "I know I get it. You can be sad." Even I think he encourages us in our sadness, like, you can be devastated. You know, one of my favorite stories is about Jesus. So I love this story. Because Jesus just found out that John the Baptist had been murdered, beheaded his dear, dear friend and cousin, even. The apostles tell him about it, and he's like, "I gotta be alone." So he leaves to go be alone. But he doesn't get to be alone, because 5000 people follow him. And so they follow Him. It says he has compassion on them, and He heals their sick. And then he feeds them, right? Like he takes the time to feed them. I love this idea that he feeds them. And there's 5000 of them. We talked about this on the podcast when I learned that five in Hebrew is the number for grace. And 1000 in Greek is a symbol of complete totality that no one is left without. And here are 5000 people who ate until they were filled. And then there was even baskets of food left for anybody that happened to come. And I love this idea that Jesus is grace. There's enough for everybody. And I feel like Grace is this this love and this encouragement, but he got done doing that for the people. And then he's like, I gotta go now. Like he sent the apostles off into the ship and he went away. And it says he went into the mountain to pray and to be alone. And I think that that was that space where Heavenly Father's like, "it's okay. You can grieve. Go ahead, Jesus go through all of the phases, be in denial, be in anger, be in and, you know, whatever it is, then finally you end up in acceptance." It takes some time. But I think what's interesting is that he never went back to Herod to say, "you big jerk, why did you hurt my cousin?" No, he didn't. He didn't go to the aggressor. He, he served. He encouraged people. He again, going back to that definition, Christ is the ultimate act of giving courage, confidence, and success. And that's what he gave to 5000 people before he decided to be alone and mourn. And I feel like in my life, when times come that are really hard and really sad. The only thing I can do is choose to look to God and live. I love that scripture in the Book of Mormon. And that's what Jesus did. He looked to God, and he continued to live his life. And he continued to serve. He didn't ever get closure with Herod, that we know of. And I think sometimes we live in a society where it's like, well, you need closure, you've got to go and talk to the people that hurt your feelings. And there's some truth to that. But sometimes it doesn't work. And sometimes you're not going to get the closure you need. So you start to encourage others, and you look for opportunities to serve like Jesus did.
Kathryn Davis 16:16 Have you seen that in the last week or two of your life? Looking for opportunities to serve others?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 16:24 Absolutely. I mean, my, my sixteen year old came to me and said, "Can we go to the temple once a week?" Okay, let's do it. 6am. You bet. I don't want to get up that early. But I'm going to, you know, and, and there have been so many opportunities for me to just look to God and live. And while things are not better in my life, where there is hurt feelings, and a lot of emotion. I think they'll get better in time. But right now, I'm just, I'm just gonna sit in this space, like, Yeah, I'm sad. It's okay. So I love how you asked me that, Kathryn, because there have been multiple opportunities for me to serve. And to be kind to other people and to encourage-- that's the word to encourage. Yeah. Oh, I'm so glad you asked that. Because now I have a flood of memories of just the last two weeks. Conversations I've had with people, experiences. Yep. God has given me so many chances.
Kathryn Davis 17:17 And as you've done that, in the last two weeks, what has that done for your heart?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 17:24 Oh, it's helped it to change for sure. Yeah. And it's helped me to to also gain perspective. Because, you know, the situation that has broken my heart, there was an airing of grievances, as they like to say on Seinfeld, everything I love goes to Seinfeld. There was an airing of grievances and words were exchanged. And there was one thing that was said to me that was so devastating, and so poignant. Like it hit my heart, and I just sobbed like a baby. And now I've been out of it for a couple of weeks now, almost a month. And as I've looked back on what was said to me, I was like, Well, you know why they weren't wrong. That actually is true about me. I didn't like hearing it. But that's perspective. Yeah, they're right. And it's helped me to just realize it's not all about me, even though I want it to be. I'm going to, I'm going to get through this.
Kathryn Davis 18:14 So Tammy, let's think about that for a moment. Because it's clear that Jesus and the scriptures have told us that we need to be encouraging that by this show, all men know that you are my disciples if you love one another. And then in Matthew five, verse 44, love your enemies. bless them that curse you do good to them that hate you and pray for them, which despitefully use you and persecute you.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 18:41 Oh, it's so hard.
Kathryn Davis 18:42 How do you get there?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 18:43 Boy, sister, I don't know. Like I'm still every day, every day I'm struggling to figure that out. And I think I mean, again, it just goes back to, of course, encouraging. The act of encouragement with everybody you meet, if that's the first thing that you do when you meet someone is encourage them in some way, it's pretty good foundation. It's great way to start out a relationship. And I'll tell you encouragement has looked so different. Like it's not always verbal. And my one good friend Brown encouragement from her. She's so good. Like, she'll bring you a little treat is what we call it or a prize. It's just cute little things. It's a text. It's a phone call. It's a funny voicemail. Like, all across the board. There are just so many ways you can encourage people that are easy. Some people aren't good with words.
Kathryn Davis 19:29 And I think we underestimate the power of encouragement, truly, that when we really encourage others, we can lead them to the Savior. In Mosiah 18:8, we read that the baptismal invitation, and we might overlook this part, but I think this is really important of the baptismal invitation that we are to bear one another's burdens, that they may be light. That there is the space in bearing one another's burdens to make them light, and how can we help make those burdens light? I think it's through encouragement.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 20:06 Well, the thing I love about this verse is Fiona Givens taught me this, she said, the baptismal covenant is all about literally knowing just how heavy that cross is. Like when Simon picked up that cross, he felt the wood, he felt the weight of it on his shoulders, he knew where best to place his hand to carry it. And I think when you truly know someone, and you are and you've offered to carry their burden, you are physically, emotionally mentally becoming intimate with their burden. Like you, you know, what you're carrying. And I think that that is powerful. And how you do that, again, straight out of the gates, when you meet someone, you have this level of encouragement, because then you get to know them, and they'll share their stories with you, and their heartbreaks, and their sorrows and their glads and all that stuff.
Kathryn Davis 20:55 Tammy, can I ask you to think back on this last month that's been hard. Obviously, very tender, and very hard. Has there been someone or multiple people who have come in to bear your burdens and make them light and given you encouragement? Even when you didn't think you could?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 21:18 Yeah, I mean, it's my husband. I just and I pause it saying that, because, you know, I waited to get married till I was 35. And before that, it was my best friends. And so I love that God just puts people in our lives at certain times. But my husband, yeah, for sure. He's listened to me. He's let me cry. He's gotten mad for me. He's defending me. Like, how awesome is that? To have someone on your team? That's like, yeah, they're the worst. And then he'll be there for me when I realized they're not the worst. He's like, Yeah, they're the best. Okay, now we like them. You know, it's like, he can switch that way, which is so cool.
Kathryn Davis 21:55 And don't you think a powerful part of encouraging is encouraging people we love to turn to the Savior? Yeah, he's the one who can provide the ultimate encouragement and healing. And it's okay if it's not easy. It's okay if it's hard. It's okay if it takes time.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 22:15 Yeah, because he went up to the mountain to be alone. So when when I'm sad, he's like, "it's okay. I get it. I took some time too. I probably would have wanted more. But I had to go back to work." So I think, like, yeah, he totally, again, who better to give us encouragement? I just love that the act of giving courage, confidence and success. The Savior is the only person who can perfectly do that for us, because he knows. Like, I'm wondering, too, with your life, like, what does encouragement look like for you, Kathryn?
Kathryn Davis 22:42 Well, that is a good question. Because I think it's taken people in my life who have seen things that I can do and encouraged me to do it. I don't know if I would have thought I could be a seminary teacher without some very pivotal people saying you can do this. I don't know if I thought I could especially do this podcast without people believing in me. And it's that encouragement and that belief in me that at moments when I haven't had that belief in myself, that has really gotten me to try. And even if I fail, it's okay, because there are people who think I can do it. So I'm going to try.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 23:26 Right. It's so awesome. Because it just endears you to those people, doesn't it? Yeah.
Kathryn Davis 23:32 Yeah. And it makes me want to be one of those people more than anything. Yeah, I want to be one of those people that in every interaction, I can build them. And especially I love that thought of the best is yet to come. Because I was talking about this couple of weeks ago, my kids are starting to leave the house and my son just left on his mission two weeks ago. And I just think well, was that the best part of my life? Like, is there anything good left? Yeah. And I just kind of wondered and struggled with that. And, and that statement, the best is yet to come gives me so much hope and so much peace that God is saying, "Kathryn, things have been great. But it's even gonna be better if you can build."
Tammy Uzelac Hall 24:21 Right? Oh, I absolutely agree. And the whole times and seasons. I mean, we just kind of go through this every year that cycle's over and now you get to start fresh, brand new and new people are gonna come into your lives. And yeah, being a peacemaker... and I liked the part in the talk where he said that peacemakers thwart the adversary. Because like I said, I've always been a peacemaker. I'm a pretty peaceful person. In fact, you know this list, when we talk about spiritual gifts, when Marvin J. Ashton gave his also other list of spiritual gifts. He's like the gift to pray, one of them is the gift of peacemaking, and then the gift to avoid conflict. That's me. I don't like conflict at any, like, I can't stand it. I don't like discord. I don't like to fight. And so when I come to this situation, it's so new to me, like what? Someone wouldn't like me. I can't believe someone doesn't like me. That's the craziest thing in the world because there was a part in this talk. I had to laugh. I'm going to read this. He said, and I marked it a couple of times. Oh, I'm so funny. I cracked myself up. He says differences of opinions are a part of life. And I wrote what if there about you? I don't agree with what you think about me. And then there was another part that he said right here? How do I avoid conflict when there are differences of opinion? And then he says, this was the funny one, this is one of my favorite parts of the whole talk. Now, I'm not talking about peace at any price. And the footnote to that, there's a little footnote, and if you click on it, what he's saying when it says no, I'm not talking about peace at any price, he says, It does not require us to agree with the ideas or beliefs of others. And I was like, Yeah, I don't I don't believe with the ideas and beliefs that people have about me in this situation. So like, I completely disagree with them. And I am not willing to pay the price to be a peacemaker. And that's when the Spirit's like yeah, that's not exactly what he means. I mean, you can disagree. And you can also be a peacemaker. And so I think I will, I think in the end, it's all going to work. Of course it will, it'll all work out, it'll be fine. I'm just going to be sad for a little bit and work out my own feelings and emotions. I'm going to encourage as many people as possible, keep going to the temple, encourage the heck out of anybody's lives who comes my way. And then I think it will just resolve. It will. It does. That's what's so great about life is time does heal all wounds. It really does.
Kathryn Davis 26:41 It does. And I think encouragement is a step of that healing process, right. In fact, I love when President Nelson says this, "Today, I am asking us to interact with others in a higher, holier way. Please listen carefully. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or have good report, or praiseworthy, that we can say about another person, whether to his face or behind her back, that should be our standard of communication."
Tammy Uzelac Hall 27:09 Yes. And I completely agree.
Kathryn Davis 27:11 That was a little gut check for me. Is that my standard of communication behind their back with my husband or with my girlfriends? How have you tried to practice that standard of communication?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 27:25 Oh, that is so great. I will tell you a very real experience I had. So I was talking about someone I grew up with in high school. And they posted some pictures on Facebook. And I was talking to my sisters about this person. We were talking about the pictures that they had posted, and we were making fun of the pictures of them. We're like, can you believe they posted that? Oh my Gosh, seriously, that is like, that is exactly how I probably sounded. And I did it in front of my daughters who were teenagers, new teenagers, 12 and 10. And I had a major, major gut check, as you like to say, and I looked at them, and I realized, who Who do I think I am? And I immediately stopped. And I caught myself and I just said Lily and Sophia. I am so sorry you had to hear me say that. That was unkind. And I will never do that again. And I hope you never ever do what I just did. Because that was rude. And I mean, it was a real moment for me where I had to just get called out by the Spirit. Like why would you say that? So I'm learning from all my bad mistakes.
Kathryn Davis 28:27 What changed for you in that moment?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 28:29 Seeing their faces as I was talking. Like, why would you say that mom? I mean, they were kind of looking like their eyes were a little doe eyed, like, her eyes were big. And I realized I shouldn't... what am I doing? Yeah, that was a real moment.
Kathryn Davis 28:43 So what have you done to not go back there?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 28:47 A lot less social media, a lot less social media. I just have that that replaying in my mind. Like anytime I'm tempted to say something about the way a person looks, or the way a person behaves. I just remember that moment because I don't I don't like to apologize. I mean, I will don't get me wrong. I'll apologize. But if I don't have to, or if I can avoid a situation where I'd have to apologize. I'm gonna check myself. And so I just remember that go. Yeah, that was I'm not doing that again. That was stupid.
Kathryn Davis 29:12 Well, I think it's way more fun to be encouraging.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 29:15 Yeah, it is. And people feel good.
Kathryn Davis 29:18 Yeah. When I think of this attribute as a peacemaker, I just I think it's fun. It's fun to lift people. It's fun to build people, it's fun to see their face and to be a part of that. So why would I not want to do that more? When I selfishly, I in turn and uplifted and feel better instead of feeling terrible? Totally. So Tammy, what have you learned about the Savior? As you've learned about how he treated others?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 29:53 Oh 100% that one of his main characteristics and attributes is that he is love.
Kathryn Davis 29:58 How have you felt that?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 30:00 I have felt that from my own family members, my loved ones. And even in the midst of this yuck, when words were exchanged, I still loved the people that I'm struggling with, like, of course, I love them. I think that's why it's so hard. Because the love is so deep. And I'm like, Ah, why would you say that? Or why would you do that it doesn't make sense to me, I would never do that. And I just have to remember, like, we're not the same. None of us are. But we're all here for the same purpose, which is to return to our heavenly parents. And family is unfortunately, and fortunately, one of the only ways we can truly gain a divine knowledge of who our heavenly parents are, and the role that the Savior plays in our lives to get back to them. That's why we have family. The best is yet to come. Like President Nelson said, it really is the best, like, we think this is pretty good. Ah, wait till we get to where we've been wanting and searching to get to. It really is going to be the best.
Kathryn Davis 31:03 Well, Tammy, I have loved this conversation. You have been so real and so honest. And we like to end every conversation with a small and simple challenge, something that we can do throughout the week to implement what we've been talking about about being encouragers. So what is your small and simple challenge that we can do this week, like President Nelson asks, so that we can spend our lives building others?
Tammy Uzelac Hall 31:33 I would say, find one person in your ward that you don't know. And talk to them. And just hear their story.
Kathryn Davis 31:42 Pull out your couch and sit.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 31:44 Pull out your couch and sit and find out that person's story. That's my challenge, because I think that is how foundations get started. And you can just start create that foundation of encouragement.
Kathryn Davis 31:54 So true. Thank you so much.
Tammy Uzelac Hall 31:58 Thank you. Thanks for having me on.
Kathryn Davis 32:04 I think an important part of encouraging others that Tammy pointed out is that you build a foundation of encouragement. So maybe when there's a moment that you aren't as encouraging as you want to be, your relationship is still built upon a foundation of encouragement. Thank you for being here and hop on over to Instagram at magnify community for more inspiration and conversation. And of course, subscribe and listen to the Magnify podcast wherever you get your shows. See you next week.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai